tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9072553505203981041.post8226014727331137662..comments2023-07-17T03:38:29.972-07:00Comments on Pudding. Without Meat.: Why Unschool: Part OneCORootshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14579526335845538150noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9072553505203981041.post-1325310876508471652010-06-08T22:13:12.401-07:002010-06-08T22:13:12.401-07:00So sorry! I didn't have notifications set up ...So sorry! I didn't have notifications set up yet for comments, so I didn't see this until right now! :-/<br /><br />I like your "Time and Place Freedom Enthusiast" title! I'd say I'm the same way, but with probably different priorities than you or someone else may have, for example... I think the whole concept of "showing your best" in church is B.S. and I'm actually offended by it. So, there... no, if we went to church, I'd be all for Zane picking his nose if he felt like it. But, I'd also be all for "sit down during service" cause that's showing respect for the person at the pulpit. Respect is a nonstop here, because kids, as you well know, are naturally as selfish and disrespectful as can be imagined. ;-) I guess to sum it up, I totally agree with you that there are places for certain things and places for other things. But, I'm also in the belief that there are certain places not for kids, no matter how much we want them to behave appropriately and understand etiquette in an adult environment it's not in their nature and I think it's unfair to force something upon them that they simply CANNOT grasp. <br /><br />I'm not a "don't get hurt" Mom and never have been. I've a friend who's toddler just climbed HALFWAY up a chair only to fall and break her leg. I had already broken a bone, had stitches in my head, and received a third-degree burn on my leg by the time I was Zane's age. Jon's never experienced a broken bone, a severe cut or burn, or pretty well any sort of serious injury. Every person will experience things differently and every body is made differently, ya know? There is no way to keep our kids completely un-injured and in that way I'm such a "realist" that I guess it can come off to some as being cold. Each time Zane has gotten pretty hurt or Stori has fallen (500 times per day at this age) I'm there for a hug and a kiss and to hold them as long as it takes to feel better, but I think THAT'S my job as "Mom" to nurture them, not to stifle their charisma. Taking into consideration my kick-ass upbringing without Mom for most of it, I can only go instinctually here and what feels right to me is to say, "Hey, be careful...watch that step...are you sure?" and if things happen then they know damn well they have a safe place to lay their heads. I think staying out of the "control" mode when it comes to their activity levels (of course in appropriate places) allows me to not get mad at them for getting hurt, but rather understand that "damn, that hurts!"<br /><br />As for the foil thing, it was clearly not the type of thing that is intended for re-use. That's all I can say, LOL! And, I think that's where I'm coming from with the whole thing... We are the adults and we choose what we put around our kiddos. If we're going to buy a foil hangy-thingy (I love that we still have no idea what it's really called...) and put it in a doorway in an elementary school dance then we must have the intention of it being played in. These are 5-10 year olds, we're talking about. It is the responsibility of the adults to provide experiences for our kids and if we don't do that mindfully we'll find ourselves pissed off about something that really has no significant impact on anyone's lives but our own need to control. <br /><br />You've kind of inspired a new post. ;-)CORootshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14579526335845538150noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9072553505203981041.post-60045507994148837382010-05-15T07:39:26.109-07:002010-05-15T07:39:26.109-07:00First off, I've really enjoyed your blog. Kee...First off, I've really enjoyed your blog. Keep em' coming! Here is my question and general comments to you my friend:<br />I have learned that I am a "Time and Place Freedom Enthusiast" (as I like to call it, haha). If Victoria is in an environment where I feel it is safe and appropriate for her to run around, lay on the floor, act like a general nut, I am totally for it. However, if we're in a hotel, school (during school hours), church, etc. I feel like it is not the time nor the place to have freedom. I mean isn't that our job as a parent? To, because we are wiser and more experienced, limit the freedom that children have to keep them safe from harm and teach them how to be respectful.<br /><br />What would have happened at the school dance if Zane would have been exercising his freedom, jumped over another kiddo, came crashing to the floor and broke his arm? I mean, a broken arm in the grand scheme of life is not a complete devastation but think of the hospital bills, doctor visits and MOST importantly physical pain of your child. Wouldn't you look back on that situation and say, "If I just would have told Zane to be free and have fun with limits I could have prevented this". Furthermore, what if the school board had spent money on the foil door-way thingys and planned to reuse them for future dances or functions? Even if it was a stupid idea b/c it was cheap and obviously in an area where children were passing through, is it any child's right to, purposefully or not, destroy those because in telling them not to we would be impinging upon their freedom? Isn't that another parental biggie?...to teach children to respect and take care of not only their own possessions; but also, the possessions of others?<br /><br />I am by no means judging your way of thinking, but the situations above are exactly what run through my head every time Victoria wants unlimited freedom and exactly why I am the parent you probably hate (hahaha) that is shouting "NO RUNNING".<br /><br />I hope you are well my love and I can't wait to hear about more of your un-schooling journey!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com