Saturday, May 29, 2010

Attachment Challenge: Day 2

We have some cool rules in our house, if I do say so myself.  Things that keep us focused, centered, and attempt to keep us from becoming overstimulated.  These things cause Jon and I to have to work pretty hard, especially in comparison to what I hear from peers and their parenting styles.  Sometimes I read about others people's lives just to fantasize about living in their cool, calm ways of being and other times to compare, contrast, analyze differences, seek out inspiration, etc.  One of these rules is that Zane can't start playing video games for the day until he's brushed his teeth.  Sometimes this is a problem as there are days when he wakes up before us and doesn't want to wake us and sneaks video games with dirty teeth.  More often than not he is honest and brushes first, but today was one of the rebellious days.

When I woke up and saw him playing video games I asked if he brushed and he said yes.  I said "Are you sure?"  He said "Yes."  I said, "I hope you're telling the truth" and proceeded upstairs to check.  (He hasn't yet figured out that I know just by whether or not his toothbrush is wet, so it always tells the truth.)  Toothbrush was dry, Zane lied.  I came down and let him know and asked why he lied.  He was honest, "I really wanted to play video games."  "Thanks for the honesty, babe.  Go ahead and turn off the XBOX."  He took it like a champ, did what he had to do, and came upstairs with me.  It was only after we got a drink and such that I gave him his good morning hug.  Yuck!  I was so inspired yesterday by the good morning hug and so determined to make sure it happens every morning that I didn't realize how easy it is to start commenting on "rights" and "wrongs" first.  Tomorrow: no words until good morning hug has commenced!!

For our 20 minutes of Zane-chosen fun time we had a pillow fight.  Two ten-minute pillow fights.  They were F-U-N!!  I LOVE pillow fights.  The best part was watching him get a little angry during the fights, but not even angry at me.  And he didn't cross the line (while angry.)  But, it was kick ass!  I felt like he was being able to safely and courageously release a little bit of anger while doing it in a loving environment.  It was neat.  We of course added in some Jedi skills like force-pushing, force-choking, and force-throwing and that was fun too.  All together, much better than forced lego-gun-making time from yesterday.

Our 10 minutes of AI(attachment-inducing) fun was really kinda' tough.  He was having a really hard time keeping eye contact during our staring contest and while we sat feet together gently tossing Mr. Potato Head back and forth.  Then, we played thumb wrestle which went really well.  We did it with our right hands, our left hands, and then both at the same time.  Heehee!  No matter how well it goes though, one can only take so much thumb wrestling...  So, we ended it by tying my right leg to his left leg and making a three-legged pick-up-toys-from-the-living-room session.  THAT was fun.

Overall, it was another really good day.  I did have a hard time finding the motivation to be interested in playing the games with him, so 20 out of the 30 minutes didn't come until the last our of our waking day, but they both ended up really well.  Goes to show you at any age...what you don't WANT to do is usually the best thing for you.

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